Q: Why don't they let blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and the Titanic?
A. They know how many went down on the Titanic.
Q. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer?
A. The joystick is wet.
Q. Why do blondes wear underwear?
A. To keep their ankles warm.
Q. What is a brunette between two blondes?
A. An interpreter.
Q. Did you hear about the blonde that needed petrol money?
A. She sold her car for it...
Q. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
A. "Are you sure it's mine?"
Q. Why do blondes have bruised belly buttons?
A. Because they have blond boyfriends
Q. What do blondes and beer bottles have in common?
A. Their both empty from the neck up
Q. What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A. A blow job with handlebars
Q. What do you call a blond with a brain?
A. A golden retriever.
Q. What do you call a blonde in the closet?
A. The 1984 hide and go seek champion.
Q. How can you tell that a blonde sent you a fax?
A. It has a stamp on it.
Q. What do you call a room full of blondes with PMS and yeast infections?
A. A wine and cheese party!
Q. How do you drown a blonde?
A. Put a scratch 'n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
Q. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio?
A. It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too.
Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the banana peel on the floor?
A. Oh no, I'm going to fall again!
Q: How do blonde braincells die ?
A: Alone.
Q: How do you change a blonde's mind?
A: Buy her another beer.
Q: How do you measure a blonde's intelligence?
A: Stick a pressure gauge in her ear!
Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?
A: Tell her she's pregnant.
Q: How does a blond spell farm?
A: E-I-E-I-O
Q: Why are blondes like pianos?
A: When they aren't upright, they're grand.
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like Hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Q: What do you call a blond mother-in-law?
A: An air bag.
Q: Why do Blondes wear earmuffs?
A: To avoid the draft.
Q: What's the mating call of the brunette?
A1: "All the blondes have gone home!"
A2: Has that blonde gone yet?
A3: When is that blond bitch going to leave!?
Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips?
A: From trying to blow out lightbulbs.
Q: Why did the blonde climb up to the roof of the bar?
A: She heard that the drinks were on the house.
Q: Why do blondes work seven days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.
Q: What is the difference between Elvis and smart blondes?
A: Elvis has been sighted.
Q: What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs?
A: Some traffic signs say stop.
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley?
A: The shopping trolley has a mind of its own.
Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
A: Wave to her.
Q: How does a blonde get pregnant?
A: And I thought blondes were dumb!
Q: Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
A: (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno!
Q: Why do blondes hate M&Ms?
A: They're too hard to peel.
Q: What do you call a blonde without an asshole?
A: Divorced.
Q: Why do men like blonde jokes??
A: Because they can understand them.
Q: What does a blonde make best for dinner?
A: Reservations.
Q. What do blondes & screen doors have in common?
A. The more you bang them the looser they get.
Q. Why don't blondes have elevator jobs?
A. They don't know the route.
Q. How do you get a twinkle in a blondes eyes?
A. Put a flashlight in her ear.
Q. What do blondes & computers have in common?
A. You never appreciate either one until they go down on you.
Q. Why do blondes use tipex on their computer screen?
A. They couldn't find an eraser.
Q. How did the blonde break her leg playing hocky with the Toronto Maple Leafs?
A. She fell out of a tree.
Q. What do blondes & turtles have in common?
A. Put them on their backs & their both screwed.
Q. What's the mating call of a blonde?
A. I'm getting so drunk.
Q. How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
A. 8-- 1 to bake them & 7 to peel the M&M's.
What does a blond and the Bermuda Triangle have in common?
They've both swallowed a lot of seamen.
Q:What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A. The brick doesn't follow you home after you lay it.
